Synopsis: Rose’s
cousin Sven comes to visit and Blanche ends up using him to make her
boyfriend Floyd jealous; Sophia wants her driver’s license renewed.
80s Flashback
Dorothy, talking
about Sven: “Uh Rose, could you introduce Blanche and me?”
Rose: “Oh of
course, Dorothy this is Blanche, Blanche this is Dorothy! We have
jokes like that around here all the time.”
Dorothy: “It’s
like living in a house full of Howie Mandels.”
Let’s Get
Political
Rose: “In the old
country, when a woman dumps a man the man is allowed to shave the
woman’s head and make her wear an itchy hat.”
Dorothy: “I hear
Pakistan has the same penalty for jaywalking.”
St. Olaf Vocab
Flenderhooven –
oatmeal served with crackers made of yak intestines, aka “yak
snacks”
That’s What She
Said
Rose: “The longer
you wait, the harder it'll get!”
Lewd Ladies
Blanche: “Why,
Rose Nylund! Why, that cake is in the shape of-”
Dorothy: “Blanche,
we know what it is.”
Rose: “I thought
it was in the shape of Florida.”
Blanche: “That
reminds me, I've gotta give Charlie Milburne a call.”
Dorothy: “If this
cake reminds you of Charlie Milburne, we could both give him a
call.”
Zbornak Zingers
Blanche: “Rose,
that's only one side of it. Look at the other side. He did get to
kiss me.
Dorothy: “Big
deal. More people get to kiss you than the Pope's ring.”
Insult Watch
Sophia: “Were you
two the cousins who played the banjo in Deliverance?”
Tales From the Old
South
Blanche: “You
know, I've always had this trouble ever since high school. I was the
head cheerleader and I was dating our star quarterback, Calwell
Honeycutt. Well, time came to break up but I just could not tell
Calwell to his face. I couldn't bear to inflict that much grief and
suffering on one man. So I finally decided that the best way to
handle it was just to lead my girls in a farewell cheer.
Two-four-six-eight, who will Blanche no longer date? Calwell!”
Dorothy: “Did he
get the message, or did the band have to spell out 'buzz off' at
half-time?”
Sassy Sophia
Dorothy: “Ma, you
went through the stop sign, you hit a mailbox, you almost ran over
Mrs. Burlefine!”
Sophia: “Please
the woman’s already in a wheelchair how much more damage could I
do?”
Reel References
Blanche: “Doesn't
that get confusing, having two 'Big Svens'?”
Rose: “There
aren't Blanche. There’s Big Sven and Big Sven II, like Jaws and
Jaws 2.”
Dorothy: “Rose,
are any of your relatives named Psycho and Psycho II?!”
Take Me Out to the
Ballgame, Stanley
Dorothy: “Ma,
you're 81 years old. Your eyesight is weaker. Your reflexes are
slower.”
Sophia: “And who
are you, Magic Johnson?”
Oh Shut Up, Rose!
Dorothy: “Rose,
everything okay down at the counseling center?”
Rose: “Yes,
finally. We had a manic depressive overload but luckily Dr. Ferguson
had heard some new knock-knock jokes and that seemed to do the
trick.”
Dorothy:
“Knock-knock??”
Rose: “Who's
there?!”
Dorothy: “Oh shut
up, Rose!”
Dorothy Zbornak is My Spirit Animal
Blanche: "I was only blessed with one talent, turning men on. I've just never known how to turn them off… You tell him, Dorothy!”
Dorothy: “I would, Blanche, but remember, we just want to turn him off, not drain the sex drive COMPLETELY OUT OF HIM!!!”
Product Placement
Blanche: “How long
had you been together with this guy?”
Dorothy:
“Thirty-eight years.”
Rose: “That was
Stan??”
Dorothy: “And you
know, to this day, he can belch out the chorus to 'Sweet Georgia
Brown' on one Dr. Pepper.”
Best of B.E.D.
Blanche: “He said
he had to go visit his sick mother in the hospital. Did you ever hear
such a weak excuse?”
Dorothy: “And his
mother isn't in the hospital.”
Blanche: “Of
course she is, but he can visit her anytime. He can only see me
tonight.”
Golden Quotes
Blanche: “You
know, I never thought I’d say this, but I think Rose has got the
brains in that family.”
and
Rose: “What’s
this boat she keeps talking about?”
Dorothy: “Don’t
worry Rose, you missed it.”
Critique: I know it's been a
while since I've been in school but can someone explain Sven's
reference to the Cape of Good Hope? It's in South Africa, so why
would Sven need to sail around it to get home to Scandinavia from
Florida? Or is it just one of the million jokes about him being as
dumb as a box of hair? But I digress. Any episode that involves any
of Rose’s weird relatives or family traditions is a winner in my
book. I love the way Blanche is constantly mispronouncing Sven’s
name. It’s also fun to see a person who is more naïve than Rose.
But the standout moment of the episode is the brief bit with the cake
from the Get It While It's Hot Erotic Bake Shop; it's a priceless,
hilarious scene including Dorothy’s classic baritoned, “WHOA!”
Unfortunately, Sophia’s storyline about getting her driver's
license again is only an excuse to make jokes about running over
people (even though they're still pretty funny). And this episode
continues the writers' endless obsession with Burt Reynolds. GRADE:
B+
This is a great episode up to the point where the doorbell ring and the Scandinavian beauty is standing on the other end to escort Sven home. It is obvious that not all things in pretty packages are golden as she is obviously a bit on the controlling side. He'll be regretting that choice for a long time.
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