Synopsis: Rose’s
boyfriend Al retires and wants to sail around the world with her.
Meanwhile, the girls have trouble turning their garage into a guest
room.
80s Flashback
Dorothy: “If you
walk out that door you can forget about ever coming back. I sound
like I’m on ‘Ryan’s Hope.’”
St. Olaf Vocab
Sperhooven krispies
– An ancient Scandinavian midnight snack. They’re done when
you’re about to throw up from the stench. To enjoy them properly
you have to hold your nose with one hand and eat them with the other.
They allegedly taste like cheesecake, fresh strawberries, and
chocolate ice cream.
Crazy Continuity
Blanche tells Sophia
that a woman is at her sexual peak at age 33. But in the very next
episode, Blanche claims that a woman in her 40s is at her sexual
peak.
Also, Dorothy says
she loves champagne, but in “Nothing to Fear But Fear Itself” on
the plane she says she doesn't like champagne.
That’s What She
Said
Ernie, the
contractor: “Mrs. Devereaux, do you want it fast or do you want it
good?”
Lewd Ladies
Sophia, translating
Vincenzo’s Italian: “Dorothy, you’ll hold the window in place,
Rose will do the hammering, Blanche you’ll do the screwing. And he
came up with that one on his own I swear.”
Picture It
Sophia: “Picture
it: Sicily 1939. The war is on. A promising young architect is
offered a job to spearhead construction of a new wing at the Vatican…
The young man is torn. Taking the train to Rome means running the
risk of enemy bombs. But staying home means passing up a chance to
make history! In the end, he chooses safety. It's a decision he still
regrets half a century later. His conclusion: Life without risk is no
life at all.”
Zbornak Zingers
Blanche, to Rose:
“You upset because you still don't know what to do about Al?”
Dorothy: “No
Blanche, she's upset because Jimmy Swaggart can't cover his motel
bill.”
Insult Watch
Ernie the
contractor, to Dorothy: “A good-looking lady like that sleeps
alone, I’m shocked.”
Sophia: “You’re
letting a man with taste like that remodel our garage?!”
Sassy Sophia
Sophia, upon seeing
the girls holding their noses: “Hey, give me a break you can’t
smell that from the hall.”
Best of B.E.D.
Sophia, translating
Vincenzo: “Drill a toggle bolt, anchor with a 5/16th bit, and
miter-cut the quarter-inch plywood after you attach the studs.”
Blanche: “The only
thing in there I recognized was studs.”
Back in St. Olaf
Blanche: “Rose,
haven't you ever done anything just wild and crazy and impetuous?”
Rose: “No. I'm
from St. Olaf. We're forced to sign a pledge when we're 15 that we
won't do any of those things.It keeps people from painting their
houses silly colors.”
Take Me Out to the
Ballgame, Stanley
Sophia: “In
Sicily, every region has its own dialect. Actually, every town has
its own dialect. Actually, every household has its own dialect. This
also explains why the Italian army is as effective as a Jamaican
bobsled team.”
The Boob Tube
Rose: “Al, we have
to talk.”
Al: “Can't it wait
till after Moonlighting? There's a special episode on tonight. It's
only been rerun three times.”
Reel References
Sophia: “Here they
are, Dorothy. Vincenzo's new work crew.”
Dorothy: “It looks
like the road company of 'Cocoon.'”
Golden Quotes
Sophia, translating: “Before we begin, let’s make one thing clear: I am in charge. I am the boss. I am the master. I am the walrus.”
Dorothy: “Ma, either your Italian is rusty or he’s the world’s oldest hippie.”
Blanche: “I love
champagne.”
Dorothy: “Me too,
the only problem is after a few glasses I’ll kiss any man in
sight.”
Crewman: “Man
overboard!”
Blanche: “That was
just a coincidence Dorothy.”
Critique: This is an extremely
funny episode filled with great lines (“He thinks I'm neater than
hard salami!”). The two storylines don’t quite connect in any
real meaningful way but they each have their merits. Most of the
humor comes from the Italian man they hire to remodel the garage. The
line about Dorothy kissing any man in sight after drinking champagne
and the instant splash sound is impeccably timed and Sophia teasing
Dorothy about a man wanting to sail around the world with her is
hilarious. Also, in a classic GG scene, Rose shows the girls how to
eat Sperhooven krispies (“Rose if these had been offered to the
Donner party they still would have eaten each other.”). Good stuff
here. And lastly, did any one else notice all the references to
barrels in this episode? GRADE: A-
Also under crazy continuity, in the second part of the Sick and Tired episode, Dorothy asks the waiter for "your best champagne"
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DeleteRose's boyfriend Al #2
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