Synopsis: Initially distraught over the fact that she may be pregnant, Blanche finds out she's actually going through menopause which sends her into a depression spiral; the girls questionably go into the mink breeding business.
Rose: “She's in there!”
Dorothy: “Really, Columbo?”
We never see or hear from Fluffy, Muffy, Buffy, and Joanne again. JOANNE??
Also, Dorothy says she always wanted mink and yet her MINK STOLE was stolen - and then returned - just last season in "Break In."
Let’s Get Political
Dorothy: “Look at it this way. You don't get cramps once a month. You don't go on eating binges once a month. You don't get crazy once a month.”
Sophia: “You just grow a beard... You grow a beard Dorothy, believe me. I woke up one morning, I looked like Arafat.”
Dorothy: “I know how you feel about animals. And since we're breeding mink for fur, eventually they're gonna have to be killed. I didn't think you'd go for it.”
Rose: “Do they have to be killed?”
Sophia: “No, Rose. Many women like wearing coats that urinate.”
Rose: “We had a pig once. All the male pigs loved her. Oh she was very beautiful. And she got pregnant and we never knew who the father was.”
Dorothy: “Oh my God, Rose. What did you do on Father's Day?!”
Blanche: “I did a home pregnancy test. It's right here.”
Rose: “It looks like a perfume sample.”
Dorothy: “Put it behind your ears, Rose.”
Rose: “I never grew a beard.”
Sophia: “You never grew brains either!”
Tales from the Old South
Blanche: “My whole childhood, I kept hearing about the curse. How when I was 13, I was gonna get the curse. I was absolutely terrified. The year of my 13th birthday, I slept with the lights on all year. I was sure there was a witch behind every wisteria. Didn't go out on Halloween, I was a wreck. But the year went by and no curse. Then the next year went by, no curse. Then finally, when I was 15, Mama took me to the doctor, cause I still didn't have the curse. And he said, 'Blanche, do you mean to tell me you still don't have your period? I said, 'Well of course I have my period, you fool, I'm not a child. I've have my period almost two years. It's the curse I don't have!'”
Dorothy: “Well I tell you, menopause was wonderful for me. It meant no more PMS.”
Blanche: “I never had PMS.”
Rose: “Neither did I. But I had a BMW.”
Sophia, referring to her period: “I got it nobody told me, I didn't get it nobody told me. I figured this is life and went back to my meatballs.”
Best of B.E.D.
Blanche: “Nobody in my family has ever seen a psychiatrist. Except, of course, when they were institutionalized.”
Blanche: “You're a man. You wouldn't understand.”
Dr. Barensfeld: “Why wouldn't I understand?”
Blanche: “Well, you don't get old and lose your appeal the way women do. Look at Mr. Cary Grant, now he can have any woman he wants and he's in his 80s. You just show me a woman in her 50s who can do that and don't tell me Joan Collins, that woman belongs in a wax museum.”
Rose: “A baby. She's gonna have a baby!”
Sophia: “And if it's a boy she can name it after its father, Rick Joe Bob Don Dave.”
Critique: “End of the Curse” is arguably the best season opener of the entire series. This half hour is overstuffed with comedic goodness. There are too many good scenes to even count but let's try anyways. There's Blanche's revelation that she's pregnant in which Rose quickly faints, and then the discussion of the color of the pregnancy test; then there's Dorothy's hilarious conversation with Rose about Spanish Fly (“Because it wears a little sombrero, Rose!”), and of course one of the series' best “cheesecake scenes” in which the girls discuss beginning their periods and ending their periods. Rue's Emmy Award-winning performance here is simply wonderful. Even if the idea that the girls would breed minks for fur feels a little awkward (mostly because the actresses were staunch animal loves off camera) it makes for some good moments including a fun counterpoint to the end of Blanche's ability to "breed." I'd argue that this is one of creator Susan Harris' strongest scripts, hers always tend to be more dramatic but there is so much great character stuff and classic lines that it remains a top tier episode. GRADE: A